I’ve always loved the idea of starting afresh at this time of year. It must be the residue of that back to school mindset. For me, this makes September the new January when it comes to goal-setting. Having said that, rather than the term ‘goal-setting,’ I tend to use ‘intention setting’, ‘commitments’, and ‘promises’. These are more meaningful, richer words to me.
One of the things I love about the word ‘intention’ is that it doesn’t get us stuck in the ‘how’, it helps us get clear on the ‘what’ and the ‘why’. It also dovetails with my favourite analogy when it comes to goal-setting and that’s sowing seeds. We get to determine what seeds we sow. We don’t do the growing, we tend the soil, life does the growing. For me, goal-setting, intention setting is all about co-creating with life. I want to work in alignment with the power that makes the earth orbit the sun and keeps the stars in the heavens.
What do you want to change?
It can be easier to embark on a goal-setting exercise by identifying what we no longer want. It’s often our current pressure points, pains and stresses that eventually push us to reach for something new. So that’s the first question I’m posing is – What do I want to change?
All goal-setting exercises are ultimately based on the question – what do I want? But this can be a hard question to answer. Changing the verb opens our minds and hearts to new possibilities. How about – what do I crave? Or, what do I yearn for?
Remember that behind every goal, dream or desire is a request to feel more of a positive emotion. When we know what that emotion is, any goal we set becomes a vehicle to that destination. The more vehicles, or options we have of connecting with the ultimate emotional payoff, the more fun life will be.
If the world was working perfectly!
Another construct that works beautifully is completing the sentence – ‘Over the next few months, if the world was working perfectly for me, I’d …’ Personally, this one really resonates with me because it allows me to park, at least temporality, my restrictive internal narratives. As with any brainstorm, or ‘heart-storm’, there’s no right or wrong, nothing too big or too small. We don’t write down ideas for the sake of it. We put pen to paper to breathe life into an idea that excites us. Many of the great joys in my life started by answering this question, most recently, undertaking a Masters in Creative Writing.
What if the world has been working perfectly for us all along? It may not always appear that way, especially in the short-term. With hindsight though, we probably have evidence to support this thought. Life may not operate on our preferred timescales, but with the power that keeps the planets orbiting the sun and our hearts beating, the timing tends to be perfect.
Goal-setting is a central tenet of coaching. Check out the coaching services I offer to private clients.
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